blog five: manifesting with the natural flow of energy

Hello to all tuning in to read this blog post! I wanted to start by saying a huge thank you, to all the lovely people who enjoy reading all that I have to write. Each blog post is truly so different, & offers insights in a variety of ways. Insights which I hope offer you something valuable & much needed.

For this blog post, I will be exploring the topic of manifestation (yes, a very popular & highly spoken of topic).

I’ve never truly felt called to diving deep into manifestation, the techniques, the guidelines, the tips & tricks, or even the theoretical foundations that many speak of. Mostly because it has been spoken of, time & time again, but also, because I never felt called to this topic, in the same way in which many have discussed it. However, I have recently been exploring the feminine flow of life, within my own experiences, conditioning & personality traits. So much so that during a meditation recently, I felt mind-blown by the downloads & ideas that came to me.

All of which can relate in many ways to the topic of manifestation.

I have written below a small guide in which many can begin the process of manifesting & shifting their life towards their desires, using the understanding of the feminine & natural flow of energy. Specifically concerning the conditioned masculine processes, in which our society has been built around. Please know, this topic has nothing to do with gender or biological sex. It is purely focused on the energy of all. Feminine & masculine - or even, Yin & Yang. The two sides of a coin. The balance of creation - the balance of life.

But let us first begin with energy.

Our perception shows us that we live in a physical world. A physical reality. The expanded 3D.

However, we know that this is not all that there is. There are several dimensions which exist & make up the universe, as we know it & un-know it. So let’s discuss the important ones for this topic.

Before this physical 3D world, there was a purer sort of energy, in different forms.

The first dimension, pure energy. Source. Awareness. Existence. The second dimension, space & time. The third dimension, experiencing space; awareness of time. Able to reflect on and manipulate space, but time is fixed. The third dimension expanded, experiencing the diversity & complexity of space. Our entire 3D universe, physical & non-physical.

Although, we live mostly in a 3D physical world…

We experience this only because we first existed. We experience physical, only because we first existed as pure energy. The physical was born from pure energy.

The natural flow is first to be (to exist), & then to do (experience), & then to become (expansion).

To manifest what it is you desire into your life, in a way that follows the natural flow of energy, it is to be & then do, & you will become. To exist, so that you can experience - so that you can expand.

You will soon see how this is applied to a manifesting guideline. However, you might be wondering how this applies to the feminine & masculine energies that i’ve briefly mentioned.

By explaining how these concepts are important, I want to discuss how all of this came to me. I had this realisation, that lately I have been existing predominantly in my masculine space. When I was approaching business, life & even some personal matters, everything was routine, everything was scheduled, everything was happening in a rigid & forceful sort of way. I was in a space of constant doing. I was in a masculine flow of energy. Which, yes, at times is very important for this way of living, especially in the society that we have. But, the issue was not the masculine energy itself, it was in the way I was using it.

It is a common mindset for many, that in order to be who you want & to live & exist the way you want too, you must first do. You must work & work, until you get to be. It has been ingrained into us that we have to work at a certain level & at a certain pace for a certain amount of time in order to receive the fruits of our labour - in order to enjoy the things that we have worked so hard to achieve. We have been living like this for a very long time without knowing that this masculine flow of energy, that this order of doing & then being goes against our natural way of existing.

Remember, it is be & then do. Just as is our creation - exist then experience. 1st & 2nd dimension, before the 3rd dimension.

Again, this isn't to say that doing in the masculine state of flow is unimportant. There are times where we can work at a certain level, & we can do things at a certain level for a certain amount of time & we will achieve the results that we were after - the things we want will manifest. However, because it goes against the natural state of flow & our innate beingness - it takes longer - because 3D exists after 2D (space & time). It goes against the natural order of existence - the natural flow of energy. Energy in it's pure & natural state is easy, soft & it flows. As is the feminine. It has its innate power of will, just as the physical manifestation of energy has its innate power of will, & both are important to achieve balance. However, it is the order, & the process of the feminine & masculine that is crucial to understanding this manifestation guide (& for a naturally flowing life).

So, now that a brief foundation has been laid out, let’s begin going through the steps for manifesting or shifting toward your desired self/timeline…

Manifesting with the Natural Flow of Energy

1. Identify the timeline/version of you, that you desire or want to manifest.

Who do you want to become?

It is important to first, identify & breakdown who it is you want to become. Currently, in your subconscious & conscious minds, you believe that your current self & this other version of you are separate. In a physical sense of reality this might seem true. On an energetic level it is all the same. The difference in perception is what causes separation.

You are an infinite being, who exists in an infinite version of experiences of the self. In many ways you may have placed this desired version of you on a pedestool, & thus it may feel out of reach. It will be important to align yourself equally with this different version of you.

2. Identify the physical & material items that you want.

What are the things that you want?

It is a necessary step toward aligning your current self with the desired self. You need to identify the physical & material items that this desired self has, that you currently do not. We are going to use the masculine way of doing, & reverse it. To shift from the conditioned doing to the natural being. Not to identify the doing & the having to begin the process of manifesting, but to understand why we desire & want these physical things.

The doing is a tool to help you understand the being. The doing does not exist to one day be. Masculine energy is born from feminine energy. We be so that we can do. We exist so that we can experience.

We believe so that we can achieve.

3. Identify & understand the energies & beliefs that you have tied to those physical & material items (this will explain why you want those material items).

What are the underlying energies of these physical things, that you truly desire?

• E.g. If it is designer handbags that you physically desire, what is the energy of these designer handbags that you believe will fulfill you?

• What does the desired self have energetically that you believe you do not yet have?

This step may be one of the most important steps. By understanding the energy that these material things represent, you are closer to breaking down the barriers between the current self & the desired self. By recognising the beliefs that you have attached to these physical items, you will understand the energies that you believe are the missing pieces to your fuller self (desired self).

e.g. if you believe designer handbags will make you feel more rich & abundant. You have identified an energy/feeling/belief that you are “searching for”. An energy that you have not yet discovered within.

4. Identify the feelings & energies that you believe differ from the current version of you.

What does the desired self feel & believe that you currently don't?

What do you believe about the desired self?

What do you believe about your current self?

What are the differences between these beliefs?

We are infinite beings existing across infinite experiences of ourself. We exist in all forms, in all ways. They are all you. Thus this desired version of you exists within you. You are what you desire.

The difference is in perception.

You are searching for a version of you that already feels abundant. A version of you that already has those “designer handbags”. The masculine way of doing, asks you to work to achieve that abundance in a physical sense. So that you can enjoy the feeling of abundance, after the doing.

The natural & feminine flow of energy (being), asks you to exist as someone who feels & believes they are abundant. So that the physical reality can reflect this. So that the feminine can birth the masculine. So that you feel abundant, & then you can create from it. So that you can be, & then you can continue to do.

5. Embody those energies & that way of being first (not yet the doing).

Who are you going to become?

Once you have identified the perceived differences between your desired self & current self. You are then able to close the gap. You can then embody those energies, & become that version of you from within. It is important to be that desired self, on a naturally energetic level. Tune into your intuition, & your flow state. With the focus of allowing your desired self to exist within.

It is not a force of becoming, it is surrendering to being. It is not taking on the routines & physical rituals of the desired self. As this forces you to physically become someone that you do not believe you energetically are. This way of doing asks physical energy to change being energy. It can happen, but it takes longer, as physical matter is denser energy. Being energy, is free flowing. It is easy.

To embody the energies of the desired self, starts within. Your emotions, your thoughts, & your beliefs. Your perception.

This is a process defined only by you & your natural state of being. There are no guidelines, no rules, no specific ways of doing.

This is a process of your own being - how you will surrender, & allow yourself to exist & be. Who you had once desired, as the person you now are. Physical can help support this journey, & this process. But it is not designed to rule it. The feminine flow is essential.

Allow yourself to feel abundant. Allow yourself to believe it. Allow yourself to be it. The doing can help with the consistency or triggering of these beliefs, but it will not create it.

Be & then do.

I hope this brief guide has been able to not only show you ways in which you can manifest your desires, but has provided you with insights about the natural flow & order of energy & it’s creation. You are more than just a physical being. You feel, you think, you perceive & you believe. These things are not always physical. There are non-physical (energetic) undercurrents to all things that exist.

It is the very nature of existence itself - our existence.

Tune into your natural energetic flow - beingness - & create from it.

With Love, & Light, Bella <3

blog four: experiencing, knowing & growing

at this point in my life, I often find myself reflecting on my growth, & how much my life has changed because of it.

the way that I write this, might make it seem like that I am boasting about my growth, but it’s more that I just find it so fascinating. it is such an integral part of our lives as spiritual & human beings.

we are born, we grow, & we die - this phrase makes it seem so simple.

& perhaps the idea of growth is simple.

but when you think of your own growth - of your evolution as a being. how exactly did you become the person that you are today? what does your brain know about yourself & your life?

the human brain is so good at making many of our experiences bad. our memories are often riddled with uncomfortable emotions, thoughts & realizations of the past. & when this happens, usually we go into a space of avoidance, denial, shame, regret, & or wishing that we had never experienced some of the things that we did.

how insane is it, that our brain does this to us? how insane is it that our response to the past is so negative most of the time? these experiences were your life. it was your brain’s version of how you lived the life that you have. it is embedded into your subconscious, & plays a role in your dreams. however, we often tie this to ourselves in a way that doesn’t necessarily help us.

is it not true that many of your past experiences - now memories in your brain - affect the way you react & respond to all present situations, which then creates & influences your future?

it’s almost as if you are constantly reliving the same experiences over & over again…just with different people, in different places, & maybe in different ways. but all in all, they are always the same.

you are likely constantly re-experiencing life as the first real version of yourself. you are constantly re-living your life, as the version of yourself that had not yet grown, but exists only as the self that you know.

to grow, you must first experience. & you have done this time & time again. but maybe, for some of you, you have not experienced something NEW in a long time. & i don’t mean this quite literally…i mean that maybe you have not experienced new feelings, thoughts & patterns in response to situations that may be new for you.

your brain only knows what your subconscious beliefs tell it. everything else is just ‘a potential’ until it becomes your reality — until you choose it over & over again.

of course, this can’t necessarily be said for your first memories & childhood conditioning. you had no choice but to experience what you experienced. not in the way you can now…you HAD to experience things so that one day you could GROW from them. so that you could understand yourself as the person who experienced it, the person who healed from it, & then the person who could become more than it.

you are not your experiences. you are a person who experiences, & is pushed to grow from them. the more you experience newness as an open & aware being…the more you know all of YOURSELF - the many versions of yourself. & there are infinite versions of you.

when you continue to re-experience life the way you always have, you may never truly grow. you may never truly experience something new. you may never get to know ALL of yourself.

& this is why growth is so interesting because it doesn’t just happen. we grow only when we choose to. we GROW when we decide that we want to experience more than what we already have…as the person who already has.

& that’s why growth is so incredibly uncomfortable because you are actively going against the self that you have always existed as - the only self that you have really known.

as we all know, the unknown is terrifying. (this sentence in itself has space for growth - collectively speaking).

but another thing that is terrifying, is re-experiencing every moment in your life the exact same way, as only one version of yourself, & with the capacity for nothing more than what you think you know.

blog three: choosing myself, for myself & my health

my health journey hasn't been an easy one.

fears after fears have come. some have gone, some have lingered & some, I still continue to transmute daily.

people have called it a battle, & for some time it truly felt like that - an unending battle. & yet there have been so many different kinds…physical, mental, emotional, & spiritual. 

i know one day I will go into some of these depths, you might even catch a glimpse of them in my poems. but for now, I want to express just how important it was for me & for others to change my mindset & my beliefs, about myself & about my life. because for a long time, I didn't think there was a choice when it came to "being okay". however you might define it. but in time I realized there was, & that there always had been.

i never thought I deserved goodness. i never thought I was worth it. & for as long as I can remember I gave all my goodness to those I loved, & to those who needed it.

when I found out one day my health was at risk, there wasn’t an abrupt change within me - as if I suddenly just started caring enough about myself. the only changes I felt, besides the illumination of some very dark fears, was an intense need to take care of my family.

it was because I cared about others, that I felt like I had to have hope, & that I had to choose myself. & so, for a long while, I chose myself, to have hope for myself, so that those that I loved could have hope too. i didn’t want their fears, that were so similar to my own, to come true. i didn’t want their hearts to break, because of me. it felt like the cruelest thing I could do - to hurt them with my “sickness”.

this was the shift I felt at first. this desire to show them that I would be okay, just so that they didn’t have to worry. but time & time again, this shift, this mindset, this type of drive (to survive for the sake of others) was never enough. there was defeat after defeat. & so many times I felt like the universe was trying to break me.

it was only when I chose myself, for myself, that my health improved.

i don’t quite remember the first moment that my mindset changed, when i knew my subconscious & conscious beliefs, my lack of self-love, my low self-worth, & my need to please others above myself (at all times), was destroying any chance i had at becoming healthy again.

but slowly I began to love myself, hope for myself, & trust myself because I at some point, I wanted to do it for ME. i wanted to believe that I could have goodness. that I could have joy, peace, happiness, love & freedom. & then it kind of started to seem like the universe wanted the same for me.

so now, every day, I choose it all - again & again, & again.

& now I am the happiest & so far healthiest I have ever been. & still, I will continue to choose myself, to love myself, & want more for myself because I know now, that all along…

i was worth it.

this is why my health journey is no longer a battle. so, however you'd define it is up to you. but I choose to be healthy, to be happy & to be so full of love, that anything of its opposites has no space to exist within me.

fear still comes, anger still arises, & darkness encourages me to remember & reflect upon all of my pain every now & then. & through each uncomfortable triggering emotion, memory, thought & toxic conditioned cycle - I hold space, I surrender, I let go & I choose love. for me. for you. & for everyone.

we all deserve a life of love, joy, peace & freedom. we all are worth it.

so if you want it, you just have to start choosing it.

you have to start choosing YOU, for YOU.

sending love & light always, Bella.

blog two: creating your sacred space

As humans, we are so easily subjected to the external and internal pressures of our worlds. It can be stressful, and anxiety-inducing, and can also impact our ability to balance and manage emotions. So, in this blog post, I have answered some of the most frequently asked questions about - creating a sacred space - stemming from my own personal experiences.

What is a sacred space, and why is it important to have one?

Whether you are spiritual, religious, or neither, a sacred space is important for everyone to have. In our lives, we can get so overwhelmed by the pressures and issues of others. So much so, that we tend to forget about our own needs. A sacred space allows us to manage our needs, for a large variety of purposes.

However, the purpose of your sacred space is truly up to you.

A sacred space is an area, a location, a space, that is all yours. It is a space that provides you with comfort, in times of discomfort, it is a space that allows you to feel grounded and secure within yourself and your world. A sacred space is your special place where you can simply be, feel at ease, and focus solely on yourself. There are no real requirements when it comes to the creation of your sacred space, except for the fact that it is for you.

It is important as individuals to have a special somewhere where we can breathe easy, rest easy, and simply be at ease.

You can have a number of sacred spaces. You might even find that you are the type of person who can go anywhere and feel at ease. However, for those that struggle to find peace within their busy and hectic lives, a space dedicated solely to you and your well-being may be vital for your ability to function "properly" in our intense world.

For those of you needing more than just a respite from the busyness of your world, and are looking for a way to heal, release, and practice self-love. Creating a sacred space to do this is the best way to start this kind of journey. To heal from and release trauma, conditioning and limited self-beliefs, a sacred space is essential, as personal healing requires you to go deeper within. A sacred space will provide you with the foundation, the grounding, and the physical safety to do this and feel comfortable doing so.

How do I choose the right location for my sacred space?

My sacred space is somewhere away from all the noise of my own external reality. In my home, it is my meditation corner, next to a bookcase filled with my favorite books that sit just below a large window, with a side table to the left that holds an array of large and small crystals. In this space, I also have a small mirror that I use for a number of meditative practices. When I use this space, I am sat on my meditation pillow with a candle lit, and sage or incense burning away. This is where I can simply be.

The "right" location is personal and specific to you, your needs, and your desires. Finding somewhere quiet, with easy access to solitude helps, as well as somewhere you can be comfortable sitting or lying down. The size of the space doesn’t really matter, as long as you feel safe, and secure, and are able to be at peace when using the space.

Your body will tell you if it is not the “right” spot. You will feel your body's discomfort and inability to relax. You might even feel stressed or unable to "turn off", with regards to leaving behind the pressures of your outer world. However, when you feel calm, at ease, and grounded in your space, you will know then that it is your sacred space, and that you can go there for all reasons related to you.

What are the essential elements to include in a sacred space?

As I said earlier, there are no actual rules for creating your sacred space. Depending on the purposes of this space, the "essential" elements might differ.

For those needing a space to relax and rejuvenate, you might want to bring a comfy pillow, blanket, and a way to listen to the music you love.

For those needing a space for healing, you might want the same, with the added elements of a journal for expressing thoughts and feelings. As well as a mirror for practicing self-love, and getting comfortable saying affirmations to your reflection.

For those on a spiritual journey, you may want to add tarot or oracle cards, a candle or two, crystals, incense, Sage, Palo Santo, and anything that helps you connect to your higher self.

Again, what you bring to your sacred space depends on the things you want and the things you need. As long as you are comfortable and can relax, the physical materials aren't essential. They are simply tools that add to the energy of the space that you have already created.

How do I cleanse and purify a space before setting it up as a sacred space?

Cleansing a space is important. Scared or not, energies can linger in any place and on any person. Luckily there are so many ways to cleanse and purify a space so that only your energy remains. Remember your sacred space is for you, and removing any energies from your space that aren't yours will be beneficial to you and your personal journey.

• Smudging Sage, Palo Santo, or Incense in your space can clear away any negative energies, including those that aren't yours.

• Decluttering your space can also clear and remove any energetic blockages and be a physical representation for releasing old energy, emotions, and ties to things that are no longer essential for you or your life anymore. 

• Visualizations and intention setting can also help with cleansing. This involves closing your eyes, taking deep breaths, and visualizing a bright light or cleansing energy flowing through you and your space, for the purpose of removing any negativity.

• Moonlight and Sunlight can also help to cleanse the space and any items in it. You can simply place your crystals, tarot cards, or other objects in direct moonlight or sunlight to recharge and cleanse them. You can also set your intention for the cleansing process as you leave them out overnight or during the day. Simply opening a window or blinds, allowing moon and sun rays into your space can provide cleansing also.

• Crystals such as clear quartz, black tourmaline, and selenite, are known for their cleansing properties, and as such will also aid in cleansing your space. You can place them in your space or hold them in your hands while setting an intention to clear the energy.

What are some simple rituals or practices that I can incorporate into my sacred space?

Some of the cleansing routines I listed above, can be included in the daily rituals or practices for your sacred space. However, depending on the purposes of the space you may want to add some additional practices to help ground, release, heal and transform yourself, emotions, and energies.

Some of these practices or rituals could be;

• Journalling - e.g. personal reflections, expressing emotions, purging trauma, shadow work, etc.

• Daily meditation - e.g. for grounding, daily intentions, connecting with your higher self, inner child healing, improving self-awareness, etc.

• Affirmations - e.g. for self-love, confidence, safety, grounding, abundance, good health, etc.

• Visualizations - e.g. for cleansing, grounding, manifesting, improving vibration, etc.

• Manifestations - e.g. for love, abundance, health, travel, etc.

• Gratitude rituals - e.g. gratitude list, vocal affirmations, etc.

• Pulling Oracle or Tarot cards - e.g. asking for guidance, energy check-ins, spiritual insights, etc.

• Listening to music or sound baths - e.g. for meditation, relaxation, inspiration, manifestations, etc.

I hope I have answered some of the questions that you might have had with regard to creating a sacred space. All of my answers stemmed from my personal experiences, and what worked best for me. So please remember that what works for me, might not work for you - and that’s okay! Always go within, and listen to your own personal needs in order to know what’s best for you.

If you have any questions or want to know more about anything spiritual or healing related, feel free to DM me on Instagram @angelbybellak, or email me via the contact me page.

All my love & light, Bella <3

blog one: a guiding light for others

For a long time, I have struggled with over-giving to others. 

Thankfully, at this current point in my life, I feel that am finally able to say goodbye to this narrative. A narrative that involved choosing others over myself, always. Where my thoughts, my feelings, and my well-being, were never my first priority. 

A part of me enjoyed being selfless. I liked being there for others and giving them everything I could to help them in any way, shape, or form. But the issue was - I never had anything left to give myself. It would be true to say that my cup had always been half full/half empty. And whatever I did have in this cup, id be pouring into others. Leaving me drained, empty, and with nothing left to give - to myself or others. 

There are so many reasons why I lived like this for so long, but we’ll talk about that some other time.

Today, I want to address how we help others. The way I felt and still occasionally feel, when all I want to do is help someone because I feel I know exactly what they need, to overcome whatever struggles they are going through. 

And sure, as amazing as it is that over time I have accumulated so many tools, resources, and solutions for myself and the people that I love. It always got to a point where no matter what I said, or much I said it - essentially spoon-feeding people with everything they need to fix their problems - they were never going to get it unless THEY were ready to fix it. 

They were never going to overcome or grow from whatever issues or life struggles they were going through if they weren’t ready to truly be open and help themselves. Unfortunately, for me, this was always a tough pill to swallow. I couldn't understand, why people wouldn't want all of the solutions to all of their problems. For a time, I blamed myself for not being a better support person for them. 

I'm grateful to have realised it had nothing to do with me. 

It’s like the old saying goes, you can bring a horse to the water, but you can’t make it drink. And just like what I was doing, I can spoon-feed them all I want, but I can't make them use it for their personal benefit, to help themselves get out of their situation. 

After some time, I realised that even this spoon-feeding wasn't doing me or them any good. I was giving them the solutions and they were saving them for dessert. I’d be pouring myself silly, and they would be drinking it all up. I was still being left empty, and they were quickly getting full of stuff that wasn’t even theirs. 

Essentially, I was figuring out the meaning, the reasons, and the lessons behind the obstacles and tests in their life. I was solving what was theirs, and hoping that they’d be able to live life easier. Instead, I was taking away their chance to grow, both as an individual as a soul and their ability to experience life in its truest form. 

I was inhibiting them from truly understanding and benefiting from their life lessons. This meant that, in time, a similar pattern would emerge, with similar underlying issues to test them yet again, to see if they had truly healed, overcome, or grown from what they learned previously. 

But instead of them having their own understanding, I'd be needed once more to give them the same learnings from the lesson that they’d already experienced before. The lesson, that I had already learned for them, in hopes that they’d have it easier next time around. 

I was also draining myself frequently, in hopes that my constant support for others would be enough to fill me up and make me feel good. Yet, it was never enough, and I was a cup that was never full. 

So now I understand what it means to truly be a guiding light for others. 

It doesn't mean solving their problems and issues for them. It doesn’t mean pouring everything into someone else and forgetting about yourself, to be selfless and empathetic. It doesn't mean learning their lessons and taking on their burdens so they have it easier. It doesn't mean making them understand before they are ready to. 

Life lessons are unique to us as individual souls. We are here to learn, to grow, and to evolve, and we can’t do that if we allow others to do it all for us. It is our responsibility as individuals, to learn, experience, and feel what is ours. It is also not our responsibility as individuals to give all the solutions to someone who we think needs it. 

You will never learn if you do not experience life lessons for yourself. You will never grow if you allow others to make life easier for you. You will never evolve if you aren’t open or willing to do what’s best for yourself. 

It’s like butterfly language and caterpillar people. Both as equal to the other, both as unique and special as the other, and both as deserving as the other. Yet they are still different from one another. 

You cannot make someone understand something, you can only bring awareness to them and hope that in time they will be open to learning and understanding how they can use it to their advantage, to benefit them and their growth, and to evolve from their personal life lesson.

You cannot give understanding to someone who is not ready to understand. You cannot do the work for them and then hope that they’ve grown. You cannot pour all of yourself into someone else, and expect your cup to be full. You cannot live someone else's life lesson and trust that they’ve learned. 

Insight is all you can give. Perspective is all you can give. Awareness is all you can give.  

Be a guiding light, not their light source. 

All my love <3